Monday, October 31, 2011


Halloween is only worth it if you have little kids you love.  Otherwise, Halloween sucks.

Wednesday, October 26, 2011


Pretty much every company in the world capitalizes on breast cancer awareness month.  It is kind of like you have no heart if you don't promote the pink ribbon on your logo, marquee, napkins, billboards, etc.  Delta is one of those companies.  I have never flown on Delta in the month of October but I will from now on.  All the flight attendants and airport representatives have pink Delta outfits on, they serve pink drinks, they advertise on their screens for BC research, and much more.  When they announced on the PA that pink drinks were available (this was after seeing all the people in their pink wear) I started sobbing.  Yes, public tears.  I was in the middle row between two strangers and they were highly concerned but thankfully didn't try to ask me what was wrong.  I probably cried for 45 minutes because I just love when people support the cause and then I think of my Grammy and then I think of every other grammy or mom or sister that might be fighting.  It was just a bit of an emotional outburst.  Awkward?  Yes.  But whatev.

Thursday, October 20, 2011


Today is my Grammy's birthday.  Last year all of the extended family got together on her birthday (18 days after she died) to have a party in her honor.  We had dinner, cake, ice cream, and memories galore.  This year, just one year later, things area already different.  My grandmother - as I am sure all of your grandmothers (and just women in general) - have the ability to pull families together.  They are the knot that ties people together.  That was by far one of my grandmothers best abilities.  You just wanted to be wherever she was.  People wanted to be around her.  Today we are not celebrating her birthday together.  We hardly see each other.  I feel like extended family unity is all but lost. The first sign I had of this drifting was the Race for the Cure in May.  I was the ONLY person from my family who attended.  But last year there were about 20 of us present to walk in honor of Grammy.  This year I had to do it alone.  I was 10 years old when my maternal grandmother died.  I was extremely close with her as well because she lived with us for 5 years.  I saw my mom's side of the family all the time during those years.  I can probably count on two hands the number of times I have seen my "Idaho" cousins in the past 10 years.  Is family separation just something that comes with the loss of the matriarch?  I feel like my family (on both sides and myself included) slacks off in the time commitment it takes to truly stay a part of each others lives.  It takes works.  It takes sacrifice.  It takes love.  I miss that my Grammy always brought us together for holidays, family home evenings, birthdays, etc.  I miss that my family used to love being surrounded by one another.  I miss and love ALL of my family.  I wish I could tell my Grammy Happy Birthday!

Monday, October 17, 2011


I turned my Halloween doorstep decorations into real October seasonal decor - breast cancer pumpkins! I used pink Craft Smart acrylic paint that was way cheap, about $1.35 per bottle.  I also sealed the paint with my breast cancer bottle of "Big Sexy Hair Spray and Play" hairspray.  And I finished painting them while watching the Lifetime special, FIVE, about breast cancer.  I sobbed my way through all of them, obviously.It was actually a wonderful grouping of short films all related to different women fighting the disease.  It is replaying frequently on lifetime throughout the month.  The best one is the second clip directed by Jennifer Aniston. 

Tuesday, October 11, 2011


Every October the world turns pink!  BYU - and many teams throughout October - honored Breast Cancer Awareness with an official pink ribbon game.  I saw some people with official BYU hats that had a pink ribbon on them.  Scott Clark swears they came from the bookstore but I cannot find them anywhere.  Any of you know where you can find the BYU breast cancer hat??? Last year Josh was able to score a pink Nike sweatband for me from one of the players.  This year I didn't get any swag but I did find myself crying multiple times thinking about  BYU+breast cancer+football+ homecoming game+breast cancer awareness+ the Y was illuminated+breast cancer pink everything = tears, tears, tears.  I love how pink has infiltrated all things.  I SERIOUSLY LOVE IT WHEN BYU AND BREAST CANCER AWARENESS COLLIDE!!!

Friday, October 7, 2011


One year ago today was Grammy's funeral.  It was one of the most beautiful services I have ever been to (and unfortunately I have been around the block when it comes to funeral attendance).  Gospel principles were taught and the spirit was absolutely felt.  I listened to the recording of her funeral today and felt the spirit of my Grandmother very close.  I miss her every day.  The grandchildren sang one of Grammy's favorite songs at her funeral, "Fill the World With Love."  The following line is the epitome of my grandmother:  
"And the question I shall ask, only God can answer.  Was I brave and strong and true?  Did I fill the world with love my whole life through?  And she filled the world with love!  Yes she filled the world with love her whole life through."


Wednesday, October 5, 2011


The greatest gift the Pinterest Gods have given me is the ability to organize all things Breast Cancer!!!  Take a look at my Breast Cancer Paraphernalia board and pick up some of this fantastically awesome BC themed items.  Literally everything out there is available in a "breast cancer version" like ice cream scoops, sweat shirts, bird houses, luggage, t-shirts, microwaves, lanyards, jewelry galore, rain boots, etc.  Take a look, click on the links, buy some BC gear!!!!

Sunday, October 2, 2011


Last year, my Grammy passed away during the Priesthood session of General Conference.  We knew the end had been coming for many days as her body slowly began to shut down but as my aunt said was she a "woman's woman who waited for all the men to be out of the house to die." During the Priesthood session this year Mom, Lindsay, Heidi, Aunt Rose, Aunt Lou, and myself gathered at the cemetery to celebrate Grammy.   I don't know if you can call a gathering at the Bountiful Cemetery a "celebration" but that is kind of what it was.  We had blankets, chairs, dinner, and each other.  We watched a slideshow of pictures from my Grammy's life and listened to the recording of her funeral.  Is it sounding morbid yet?  It really wasn't, it was just lovely.  We talked about all sorts of things and it was a wonderful feeling to be together in such a special place.  For her funeral my mom had a gorgeous flower arrangement made in the shape of a breast cancer ribbon.  I dried the flowers and had it sitting in my classroom this last year but I brought it back to the cemetery to honor Grammy one more time. I hope everyone finds peace and comfort in visiting the grave sites of their loves ones because it truly is a sacred place where a very special spirit resides.

Aunt Rosie

Henry sat at her headstone just talking to "Grammy Great"